The perfect soulmate

Finding The Perfect Soulmate!

When it came to getting married, I had this belief that I will only marry a girl that I knew without the intention of marriage. It makes the selection kind of easy… that was my selection criteria.

So the options were, either marry a friend, which I tried but did not work out so the next best option was extended family… well, you already know what happened : )

13 years of marriage and training almost a 1000+ candidates for marriage across the world, I saw people following some trends which are completely opposite to finding your soulmate.

I see so much pain, heartache and even divorce in couples who married for the wrong reasons. Watch the video and Learn what to look for when it comes to finding your soulmate.

Leave me a comment if you have any questions and share the video with potential candidates to help them find their soulmate with confidence.

– Murtaza

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Hey! This is Murtaza Badri and I welcome you to another video of the life transformation blog.

In this video, I want to help all of you young guys and girls who are ready to get married. You are finding your soul mate and you are looking for your other half; I know it's very intimidating and everyone wants the best. 🙂

When I was at that age, I also wanted the best. Well, I am married for 13 years; we have two kids and I want to share with you what happened and how did I go about making my decision for my life partner.

We have done a lot of programs on finding your soul mate and I have spoken to more than a 1,000 candidates who were looking for their soul mates. I just want help those of you who are confused; I don't want you to take the wrong decision, but at the same time I don't want you overthinking it.

So my story is, when I wanted to get married, I really wanted to know my spouse before I got married to her; she was not supposed to be a stranger to me. That was my belief so I got married to my aunt's daughter i.e. my mother's sister's daughter. The reason I got married to her was I already knew her. I feel you can’t just go ahead and meet somebody with an intention of marriage because I believe then they are at their best (first impressions and all). When I got married to my cousin I already knew her; there was no faking it. Everything was as authentic and there was a connection since we both knew each other. There was a bond; we could talk, we could relate to each other and then we moved it forward to marriage.

What I want you to understand is know what you are looking for when you are searching for your soul mate; maybe you’re dating or maybe meeting your potential candidate today. I see a lot of young people wanting the best; now, there's nothing wrong in wanting the best, you should want the very best! But the first point is what are you looking for, what is the search criterion for your life partner?

I would look at the search criteria basically from a point of view, as to where I am standing right now. So if I am qualified, good-looking, intelligent, outspoken or extrovert/ introvert (depending on my personality) I would look for that in my soul mate. I wouldn't go too much high; someone who goes beyond my expectations just because I want the best looks, high status, education and so forth.

That is not something I would look at, for my life partner. I would look at more of having a connection, having a bonding and understanding of each other.

We see a lot of trends -  if I am a doctor, I want to marry a doctor, engineers want to hitch to engineers, equaling status, looks and even height; or the girl has to be this inch shorter or the boy cannot be shorter than the girl; also the age. A lot more like ‘If I am in India, I want to get married only in India or I want to get married out of India or out of my city’. These are the parameters that in my mind I think, ‘Does it really guarantee a good spouse?’ So if you have a doctor as a spouse, or a businessman and not a professional, does it mean they will be a good spouse?

Or if the person is ambitious, has a lot of drive, is Alive and Fearless – is that good enough? Would you want some proof of income or good looks right off? Getting married to someone for looks and money – ‘I just want to get married to a beautiful girl or a handsome dude!’ - does that guarantee a loving, caring spouse? That's the question I would ask all of you.

Don't get me wrong; it's good to have those parameters; what is more important though is the love and connection between you and your spouse. This is what I am saying - age does not matter, height does not matter, where that person lives does not matter, the bank balance does not matter! Everything boils down to the selection criteria - do I like this person, does he or she respect me for who I am right now, are they looking at my ambitions, looking at my heart, my kindness and my nature or are they looking at my family background or what I possess, what kind of house I have, or what kind of profession I am in.

1) What I want you to do is, first please clear out your selection criteria.

Remove all the clutter! I know parents want the best for their kids. Parents, if you're listening to this – here it is. It really doesn't matter in the long run. It doesn't matter if the guy is highly educated, he might turn out to be a jerk or maybe the girl is really beautiful but she might not turn out to be a very good candidate as a wife and as a mother.

2) Now once you are clear with the selection criteria, I want you to give it a test run.

I want you to go out with this person and test all these parameters. Go out once, twice or thrice in different environments; one could be a social event, another could be with the family and other could be personal, and one more with friends, so you know who he/ she is surrounded with, what are their friends like and which environment are you getting yourself into?

3) Last but not the least; once you have the selection criteria, you go ahead and experience it, the last part is to take a decision.

Do take your time. To take a decision, I always suggest giving it 12 months - go through all the seasons. Sometimes, the person is in a good mood, but it might change according to circumstances. Experience the time together for a period of 12 months and then decide.

This is very important, that after people decide to get married, they keep judging, evaluating and rethinking – ‘I don't know, I'm not sure should I go in, or should I just quit.’ You're going to go crazy; you want to evaluate, you want to decide and once you do, just go in full swing. Do not doubt yourself!

Obviously, if there something which is completely unthinkable happens – like hitting or abusing, or you just find out some secret – of course then go ahead and decide. Decide whether you want to break off or confront.

Apart from that go ahead full swing and just commit. 🙂

Give your hundred percent in the relationship; especially in marriage, when you give you hundred percent and are patient and tolerant, are hopeful and doing your thing right, it always works out at the end.

Stay Alive, Stay Fearless! Dream Big, Stay Strong!

I hope this helps you; please share this video with all the young people who are looking for finding their soul mate -  it might help them. In the fortunate case that you are already in a relationship, already committed, make sure that it's because of the bond, it's because of the love; you are there not because of any threat, fear, or because you don't have any other option, and absolutely not because what will the world say! Make sure it's the right thing to be with the person, and you feel it in your heart, in your gut that it's the right thing to do. 🙂

Moving forward, please share this with your friends and family or whoever is ready to get married. If you have any questions regarding whatever I've mentioned, post it in the comment box, I will be happy to answer them. Subscribe to our channel; if you are still not on our email list, get on for more sources and updates.

Thank you so much for watching!

About The Author

Murtaza Badri

Murtaza Badri Speaker, Trainer & Life Coach Founder, CMD Badri’s life Transformation Academy Pvt.Ltd A peak performance strategist, relationship expert and a Life Transformational speaker, Murtaza has impacted well over twenty five thousand lives from different backgrounds, age groups, cultures around the world. He delivers fresh and transformational content in his “Alive & Fearless” programs via the power of Internet, Seminar’s, Coaching programs & Mastermind groups. He aims to empower people to go beyond what they think they can do, to what they are actually capable of doing, TODAY! Member of Experts Industry Association, USA. Murtaza is a M.Sc. in Psychology from Madras University, India. He is a certified Fire Walk Instructorfrom (FIRE) Fire Institute of Research and Education, USA, and a certified Facilitator and Trainer from Carlton Advance Management Institute, USA. He is also a certified NLP Practitioner,Timeline Therapy practitioner and a Hypnosis Therapy Practitioner from ANLP, UK. His mission is to support individuals find a purpose in life and align their actions to becoming the highest possible being that he/she would love to become. He believes that every person has the power to be, have & do whatever his/her heart desires. The only gap is a lack of imagination and a belief that he cannot.