Golden Rules of Parenting

3 Golden Rules To Change Your Child’s Behavior

I have a solution for parents who are struggling with their child’s behavior.It could be stubbornness, aggression, lying, disrespect, back answering, hyperactive, attention disorder or something else, it really does not matter.

The solution is to follow 3 Rules that I personally use and have explained in the video. I promise you will see a change in your child’s behavior within a few days.

Only and only if you can sustain following the 3 Rule’s for 30 days and still don’t get results, send me an email on crm@murtazabadri.com and I will personally coach you for free. The reason is that it might be a little more complex and might need an intervention.

Some parents are going through a lot of stress and anxiety and I highly recommend they watch this video for an effective parenting solution.

Share the video and comment, which rule are you struggling with the most.

Stay Alive! Stay Fearless!
Dream BIG, Stay Strong.

– Murtaza

Subscribe on YouTube
For Daily Inspiration Stay Connected on Facebook & Instagram

shadow-ornament

FULL VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

3 Golden Rules For Parents To Change Your Child's Behavior

Hey! This is Murtaza Badri! And in this video, I want to challenge parents who are having problems with their children. Children across age groups, right from one year old to teenagers.

So the thing is, you are struggling and your child is not listening. Evidently, he is back answering or she is disrespectful and is just not in control. And you are going crazy. At the end of it all, you are getting so frustrated that you probably start yelling, hitting or even verbally abusing your child! 🙁

So for you, I have a challenge. There are these three golden rules that I apply for my kids.

Being a parent of two kids, these are the three golden rules which I believe in. And I believe, if each and every parent out there who has to struggle a lot with their child, uses, no matter what their age, you will get results. What I mean it is using this, you will be able to relate to your child and think like your child to help your child help him/ herself.

What are the three rules? Well, just to warn you, these are the three rules that are very difficult to implement. Honestly, a lot of parents are asking us things like, my child is not listening and I cannot manage a four year old, or handle my young child of 2 years. We also get requests and questions from parents of teenagers.

And it really upsets me to see how parents are really struggling. And it’s not just the struggle of parents, the children are equally confused; they have no clue what’s happening to them and are simply reacting. Here the role of media, devices and the internet is to blame; they are bombarded with so much information across social media that they have no clue what is right and what is wrong.

So I want to help parents understand these three golden rules. If you implement these, I promise you, you will get results.

Ready? Here’s the first rule.

    • 1) No yelling

Your child does not listen to you when you want your child to do something; according to you, your schedule, your wants and your time. And your child is just not listening, and not doing what you want the child to do. What comes next is normal and every parent is guilty of doing it. You know I was guilty of doing this as well. You start yelling. Violating the first golden rule, you start yelling.

Now there’s a world of difference between two things. When you say “Can you please eat your food?” or “Can you please do this?” or something like, “I would appreciate if you would wear clothes; or study; or do <insert whatever your request is>” that is communication. But we see parents don’t communicate with their child anymore. The reason being they are so frustrated that sentences like, “How many times do I have to tell you/ You don’t listen/ You are like this only!” pour out – that is yelling, constant yelling.

Ironically, what happens is when you start yelling (in a loud voice of course), your child shuts off.

So the first golden rule for the parents is to stop yelling.

    • 2) No Verbal Abuse

Now the yelling continues incessantly. When you keep on yelling, you know what happens? The child obviously does not feel good about him or herself. And he or she stops listening to you and fails to get what you really want him or her to do any way! Which gets you more frustrated. So the yelling still continues and turns into verbal abuse. Which is the violation of the second golden rule which is you should not be doing verbal abuse.

And this is by far the most ridiculous thing which we get to hear from parents. Here parents are, calling their child things like idiot, stupid, declaring it to them that you are good for nothing, maybe followed by a why were you even born and that you are a disaster, a mistake and you are making my life miserable.

And these are the things parents tell a two year old, a four year old and a six year old! 🙁

Do you even realize coming from a mother and/or a father, these words can literally kill the child’s mind, emotion, messing up in his upbringing and values?

Does it occur to you that they stop loving themselves? Because they are hearing these things from the two most important persons in their life; and the extremes I have heard parents saying, “Why were you even born!”

I mean I don’t understand; if you have brought this child to life and you the mother has kept the child for 9 months in the womb, why would you say something like that? And maybe the father and mother are so frustrated with the child that there is no empathy and there is verbal abuse!

I really, really want to help you understand that verbal abuse refers to the second golden rule. And verbal abuse should absolutely not be done no matter the situation or circumstance!

    • 3) No Hitting

The third golden rule all parents should follow refers to hitting; you should not hit your child!

When you start abusing your child; he’s not doing something you asked him to and you start yelling. What else do you have, when he/ she is not listening; they don’t budge and they show you the hand and moreover, they give you the deaf year?

Very tempting to go and start hitting! 🙁

You hit the child, beat the child or even pinch the child; worse even you have something in your hand you throw it at the child and the verbal abuse takes a physical form.

And most often since the child is young and vulnerable, the child cannot retaliate. With that, the child retreats more into his/her shell and that just makes everything worse. So this is what I want to highly recommend to all you parents out there.

Please follow these three golden rules, which we will go over again.

1) Do not ever, ever, ever yell at your child; even if you are tempted. What you should do instead is communicate with your child - just talk to your child. Use request statements like, “I would really appreciate”, “It would be nice if you could do this”, ”You know you are such a good boy/ girl”, “Why don’t you try..?”

Communicate with love and care. That child is your own blood.

2) The second golden rule is never verbally abuse your child. You wouldn’t allow anyone else to, would you? What if I come and start abusing your child, saying, “Hey! You are good for nothing..”? I am pretty sure that the parents will stand right up and defend the child to no end. If you wouldn’t allow any stranger to abuse your child, why would you do it yourself?

We understand that you are often struggling with your own self issues. Parents themselves are often struggling with their own marriage issues, financial issues, personal relationship issues, and health issues. And then the entire frustration, unfortunately, is vented out on the child.

Please be aware if you are not Alive and Fearless, these three golden rules will require a little more effort from you.

3) The last one is hitting - physical abuse on the child. What do you do instead? Sit with your child, put your hand around your child, hug your child and kiss your child. How about that? Why don’t you do that? Now I understand parents are going like, ‘You don’t know my child; he’s a brat, he’s a monster; we can’t tolerate, we can’t handle him.

 

Well, he is your monster, right? He is your child? The child was not born a monster. The child was not born the way you are looking at your child.

It’s actually the constant observation that he/ she is looking at; and if you give the child verbal abuse, you hit and yell, what are you expecting the child to give you back? Love? Care? Listening? Understanding? Of course not! The child is only going to give you back what you give the child. Simple!

It’s like an open mirror. You hit the child and I promise you this. When the child is able to hit you back, he or she definitely will. Only because a child (in the moment) is naïve and not strong, the child is not able to retaliate; just making an alarmingly fair point!

So I really, really appreciate you watching this video. If you are a parent and watching this video, please follow the three golden rules. I know it might be difficult in the beginning but I promise you if you keep at it you will be able to do it, and do it well! 🙂

And why not take it as a challenge?

I am challenging all parents who come to me; ask me questions across social media, email and especially when I get into consulting, these are three main things that the parents have to stop doing.

And I challenge all you parents that if you can do this I promise you results.

If you stop doing these three things - if you stop yelling, abusing and hitting and if you still don’t get the results, I will personally coach you for free!

The thing is, if you do these three things and if you don’t get results, maybe there is something beyond that. So call us and I will help you for free! But the condition is you have to assure me that you have practiced these three things – that you have followed the three golden rules.

I hope this video helps you parents out there. For any questions you have for me, head on to www.murtazabadri.com and opt in to reply on the emails that we send you. I really hope this video serves all you parents out there. If you know any parent who is doing these three things (and subsequently violating the three golden rules), please forward this video to them. So that it helps the parents, the child and the entire family bring more love, peace and happiness in their lives. For all your questions, you can post them in the comment box below.

Stay alive, stay fearless! Dream big and be an awesome parent!

About The Author

Murtaza Badri

Murtaza Badri
Speaker, Trainer & Life Coach
Founder, CMD Badri’s life Transformation Academy Pvt.Ltd

A peak performance strategist, relationship expert and a Life Transformational speaker, Murtaza has impacted well over twenty five thousand lives from different backgrounds, age groups, cultures around the world.

He delivers fresh and transformational content in his “Alive & Fearless” programs via the power of Internet, Seminar’s, Coaching programs & Mastermind groups.

He aims to empower people to go beyond what they think they can do, to what they are actually capable of doing, TODAY!

Member of Experts Industry Association, USA.
Murtaza is a M.Sc. in Psychology from Madras University, India. He is a certified Fire Walk Instructorfrom (FIRE) Fire Institute of Research and Education, USA, and a certified Facilitator and Trainer from Carlton Advance Management Institute, USA. He is also a certified NLP Practitioner,Timeline Therapy practitioner and a Hypnosis Therapy Practitioner from ANLP, UK.

His mission is to support individuals find a purpose in life and align their actions to becoming the highest possible being that he/she would love to become.

He believes that every person has the power to be, have & do whatever his/her heart desires. The only gap is a lack of imagination and a belief that he cannot.